Not Suitable for Chris Hemsworth

Female Warriors in Video Game

THE IMAGE: Three sultry warrior-princesses from the planet Boobulon ready to slay, obey, and/or lay the misleading avatars of socially awkward Earth men unable to score with non-imaginary women.

THE BAIT: The unparalleled thrill of partial animated nudity mixed with cartoonish graphic violence.

THE TARGET: Fantasy-prone incels waiting for Mom to call down to the basement for dinner, wistful teen boys who dream of entering an alternate reality in which precarious breastplates are standard female attire, anyone who has ever uttered the word "cosplay" non-derisively.

THE STUPID: You must be over 40 to play this game -- that's how "adult" it is, LOL. You only have to be 18 to watch a porn movie, but this dumb game is too mature for 39-year-olds refinancing their mortgages. Even the name is stupid. "Raid Shadow Legends" -- what the hell does that mean? It sounds like the result of a Lord of the Rings random word generator. I just hope too many innocent young people born after the Carter Administration aren't corrupted.

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